Owner, Head Basketball Coach, Spice Girls Wall of Fame Archivist

Last seen 3 years ago. This is the last known image of Mr. Von-Garner, stiffly posed over a buffet of break room pastries and pies with a forced smile and eyes filled with fear. Authorities suspect foul play. If you have information about the disappearance of Keithery, please call 1-800-FINDHIM.

Owner, Break Room Pastry Chef, Stunt Double

“I’m proud of our team and the service we provide. But I swear if one more person asks me to make them a sandwich, they’re gonna catch these hands. I only make pastries.”

Candy would really like you to get outta here with your b.s. She’s busy. Leave her alone.

Sales Manager, YoYo, Trick Dice and Juggling Pin Acquisitions, Diversity and Inclusion Trainer

Her Mission Statement: “It’s hard to be mean when you’re high. I get high a lot. I’m high right now. I’m in love with Mary Jane. She’s my main thang.”

Web developer, Livestock Auctioneer, Muppet Movie Marathon Mondays Coordinator

“I do web stuff, cattle calling and some other jobs here. But mostly cattle calling.”